Tantie Talk
Over the las few or three days I keep seeing a setta articles in de
local press an' in mih email too, dat focusin' on "words", dey meanin' an' usage.
De firs' ting was from de Washington Post's Style Invitational dat did arks
people to take any word from a dictionary, an' add, subtract or change one letter an'
come up wid a new definition fuh de word...dey have some real classics, yuh should
check out de website (http://www.washingtonpost.com), click on "Style" in de menu on
de left side, dat go take yuh to de Style section whey yuh go see de link to de Style
Invitational. I putting a few ah dem below:
Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.
Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately,
shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)
Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.
Glibido: All talk and no action.
Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you're eating.
Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an a--h-le.
=====
Since I get dem, I also get a nex' setta one-liners, dat show jes how de
language dey call English could be flexible...wonderful plays on words dat make
sense to a native speaker, but mus' be pure hell fuh somebody tryin' to learn it:
- A backward poet writes inverse.
- A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.
- Dijon vu - the same mustard as before.
- Practice safe eating - always use condiments.
- Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.
- A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy.
- A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
- Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play.
- Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion.
- When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.
- A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two tired.
- What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead giveaway.)
- Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
- In democracy your vote counts. In feudalism your count votes.
- A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
- If you don't pay your exorcist, you get repossessed.
- With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.
- When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.
- The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.
- You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
- Local Area Network in Australia: the LAN down under.
- He often broke into song because he couldn't find the key.
- Every calendar's days are numbered.
- A lot of money is tainted - It taint yours and it taint mine.
- A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.
- He had a photographic memory that was never developed.
- A plateau is a high form of flattery.
- A midget fortune-teller who escapes from prison is a small medium at
large.
- Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.
- Once you've seen one shopping centre, you've seen a mall.
- Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine.
- Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.
- Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.
- Acupuncture is a jab well done.
- Marathon runners with bad footwear suffer the agony of defeat.
An' wid dat outta de way, on to a more serious setta usage of words. Is
where common sense gone in dis land? If is not de politicians abusin' de
privilege dey have in Parliment talkin' a setta tata 'bout race an' inciting
idiots out of ignominy to further pontificate purulent prose, is Cudjoe an' Sat
doin dey own version. So I was real glad to see Kim Johnson's article on page 28 of
de Sunday Guardian...it put into context all de res' ah stories/columns on
de subject of race in T&T. An' as if to emphasise it, dey did print dey
"Quote of the Week" from Samuel Taylor Coleridge right nex' to it:
Language is the armoury of the human mind,
and at once contains the trophies of its past
and the weapons of its future conquests.
:+:+:+:+:+:+:+::+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:+:
BACKCHAT: Issue 42
Just maybe you trini in woodbrook would like to go door to door and ask
each and every one who got the high water to join you dowtown at the office of the one who
is in charge of the clean-up or the relief fund to help the flood people. If you all
show up on the door step you bet you will get the attention of those people who dont know
their ass from their elbow except when there is something in it for them
//canada
Apologies for referring to the wrong man (ie Dr Khan vs his activist)
but by the time I promoting/improving/building our country. One solution for Trinidad (I
will not include Tobago out of respect to the reader from Tobago) is to get past race
politics (PNM vs UNC), as a lot of effort goes into mud slinging and
'divide-and-rule'/bacchanal, as opposed to proper governance/management. Guess it is hard to have the 'big picture'
and not let power go to your head when you are a big fish (in government) in a small pond.
Look forward to the discussion!
//Hotmail user
I jes' like it when people big up de college......an' for those of you
who doh know, there is only ONE college: Queen's Royal College! I caught Pan Royale last
year an' was pining away last weekend when I missed it. What a joy it was to read the
reports of that event vs the latest criminal act. A-boom-a-laka boom-a-lakka who are we? We are
the boys of QRC!
//Cayman Islands
As usual, I look forward to de real Trini news from you. Yea, I read de
Express on line sometimes, but it just ain't de same! Keep up de good work of keeping
de masses informed objectively.
//USA
Yuh tink dat people who obviously well educated and seem to be right-thinking should still
be usin words and expressions like "denigrate" an' "pot callin' kettle
black" an' "de black sheep of de family" an' "it was a black day in history". Dem kina words
does only reinforce and perpetuate de notion dat "black" is to be associated wid
negative tings... an' it have plenty odder words dey could choose to use. Once ah did try to
make dis point to a radio announcer and once somebody did make a small mention of it in a
letter to a editor but it ent seem to make no difference. Perhaps you can.
//Trinidad
This is a good newsletter especially for us up here in "the cold." The
only thing, please be as diverse as possible and represent all the races in our beautiful
T&T in your articles, with different types of food, dress, music, customs etc. Some recipes
will also be great! It would be nice if Patrick Manning, Prime Minister, thinks like that
also, instead of plunging our beautiful country into a racial battlefield. Maybe the
educated youth of T&T has the answer!
//Hotmail user
Being so far away, your news letter is always looked forward to and
thoroughly enjoyed.
//USA
|
|
UWI Alumni Association of T&T Chapter, Student Advisory Services,
will be hosting its "10th Annual International Wine & Cheese Festival" to raise funds to provide support for its annual student bursaries.
Saturday 15th November, 2003 from 7:00 to 10:00 pm.
The Savannah Terrace, Trinidad Hilton & Conference Centre,
Tickets: $225.00 Contact: Cristal Roberts Tel: 662-2002, Ext.2096 |
Michael
Baker's (CMB) apartments, Tobago. Self contained, kitchenette,
hot & cold, cable TV. TT$75 per person. Two hour show, World
class entertainment (calypso, reggae, ballads, oldies) One man
band.
Michael Baker's CD 2002 "one Aspiration" available.
Call 868-639-8243(home) ... 868-681-9717(mobile)
EMAIL: mbaker@tstt.net.tt
Daneil Trace Carnbee,
Tobago W.I. |
"Single - An Act of Love":
Wednesday 5th to Sunday 16th - "Single - An Act of Love", a play by
Patti-Anne Ali at the National Museum, Keate Street, POS from 8:30pm. Tickets: $50.00
available at Gentlemen's Club, Long Circular Mall; The Quest, 46 Ariapita Avenue; Sugar House
624-3235. |
"The Catalyst" appears at Couva:
Thursday 6th to Sunday 16th - Tete-A-Tete Theatre presents "the
Catalyst", a musical drama at the Rudranath Capildeo Learning Resource Centre. Shuttle service
available. For info call 636-3995. |
Studio Film Club @ CCA7:
Thursday 6th 8:00 PM - STUDIO FILM CLUB is pleased to be screening Carlos
Saura’s TANGO - which was nominated for the 1998 Best Foreign Language Film, and Asha
Lovelace’s GEORGE AND THE BICYCLE PUMP - winner of the Decibel Short Film Contest 2002, and
screened at the
Toronto International Film Festival 2002. |
'Fantasy in Dance' at Queen's Hall:
Friday 7th to Sunday 9th - The Caribbean School of Dancing proudly
presents 'Fantasy in Dance' at Queen’s Hallfrom 6:30pm nightly. The show will feature six
ballets, all choreographed by the teachers of the school, which has over four hundred
of the nation’s budding dancers, from ages 3 to 25. All students will be performing.
The forty six year old school has been the training ground for such international dance
talents as Natalie Rogers, Peter London, Nadine Mose, Camille Fitz-Worme, Zara Bartels, and
many others. Tickets are available at the School on 2A Dere Street. Call 625-3225
for more info. |
Fourth Annual "Gandhi Memorial Lecture":
Friday 7th - The Mahatma Gandhi Institute for Cultural Co-operation in
collaboration with The Department of Behavioural Sciences UWI will host the 4th Annual
"Gandhi Memorial Lecture" by Prof. A.S. Narang, Professor of Political Science &
Co-ordinator Human Rights Education School of Social Sciences, Indira Gandhi National Open
University, New Delhi.
Venue - Learning Resource Centre, UWI, St. Augustine. Time - 6:30pm.
For further information and invitations please call the Gandhi Institute
at Tel: 645-3800 or The High Commission of India at Tel: 627-7480/7481 |
Trini Revellers 2004 Band Launch:
Friday 7th - Trini Revellers, D'Harvard Section & Young Revellers invite
you to their band launch which takes place at The Harvard Club from 7:00pm to 2:00am.
Music will be provided by D.J. Production Sounds and BP Renegades. For Carnival 2004, the
band's presentation will
be "Arabian Nights". Music on the road will be supplied by Blue Ventures, Trevini Brass &
Production Sounds. D'Harvard Section's "All Inclusive" facility will be
extended to include Carnival Monday, and in 2004 the band will introduce BP Renegades Steel
Orchestra on Monday
to give you a combination of steel, brass and DJ music in the same band. Admission to Friday's
launch is $20.00 with invitation only. |
Magella's 'RareView' at St. Chad's:
Saturday 8th - Artist Magella Moreau will launch 'RareView - Architectural Heritage
Mirrors', a project which creates mirrors from found architectural
objects. To launch the project, Moreau will be presenting the works at a site which is
itself a relic of
the past – the charming ruins of St. Chad’s Church on the Macqueripe
Road in Chaguaramas, at 10:00am.
For further info call: 628-5815, 627-1718, or 788-1472. |
NPATT Schedule:
Saturday 8th to Sunday 4th Jaunary 2004 - NPATT: National Parang Association of Trinidad
and Tobago Parang Schedule:
November 08th, 2003 - National Parang Headquarters / Arima
November 09th, 2003 - Children's Parang Festival - Parang Headquarters /
Arima
November 15th, 2003 - Tennis Court / Lopinot
November 22nd, 2003 - Community Centre / Maracas - St. Joseph
November 29th, 2003 - "Semi Finals" (North) National Flour Mills
Compound - POS
December 06th, 2003 - "Semi Finals" (South) Composite School / Tabaquite
December 13th, 2003 - "Competition Finals" Parang Headquarters / Arima
January 04th, 2004 - "Le Wah" San Rafael Parish Hall / San Rafael |
| |
| |
|
